Sunday, November 27, 2011

Oh the Things they Say...

My second year of teaching I taught Kindergarten in Oregon. Two days in, I realized how many hilarious things 5 year olds say in a day and decided to keep a diary. I saved the document on my desktop on the computer so I could easily pull it up and add to it as time allowed. This proved to be such a funny collection and helped me get through those tough teaching days.
Now that I am home with an almost 3 year old, I am reminded that I should be writing down all the hilarious things he says so I don't forget, so he can some day read it, and to help me get through those tough stay-at-home mom days. Part of me probably hasn't done this because the majority of what he says, I actually say on a daily basis and that's not so fact it's quite embarassing. But, maybe you all won't be able to decipher what I say and what he came up with on his own.
Here are a few recent ones:
*"Mom, you have Noah to help you, Daddy has Jesus to help him."
*"Hey duys (guys), don't call me Maverick, call me Mav."
*"Somepins (something's) happening in my booty." (This was when he was pooping in the bathtub, gross!)
*This is just downright rude...he says this as we are Black Friday shopping. "Hey wady (lady), stop blocking the way!" (See, I told you it's embarassing, but I promise I have not said this to a stranger)
*We are working on obedience (always!!!) and we are teaching him to answer "yes ma'am or yes sir" when we tell him to do something... Me: Take the toys in your room please. Mav: Why? Me: Say yes ma'am. Mav: Yes ma'am, why?
*"Why because?" (this is in response to "because" the first time he says why)
*He says this as we pass a blow up Santa in a helicopter in someone's yard (sidenote: apparently blow up things in your yard are SUPER popular in Tennessee. I NEVER saw this many in Oregon!) "Hey Mom, look at the Christmas man in the helicopter."
*"Mom, look at my eyes when I'm talkin." (Okay, that's a dead giveaway)
*When I first get up with him and Solomon in the morning, "Mom, your hair's all jacked!"
*Mac: Maverick don't do that.
Mav: Why?
Mac: Because I said.
Mav: No said.
*Me: Maverick, look at the horses!
Mav: I like horses. I wanna ride 'em.
Me: We can't, they aren't ours.
Mav: Jesus rides horses.
*As we are driving around the mall parking lot on Black Friday. Mav: Where are we going? Me: We are looking for a parking spot. Mav: Jesus will give us a parking spot! Me: Yes, yes He will.
*Solomon is screaming in the car because he HATES his carseat and Mav says, "Solomon doesn't wike (like) me anymore!"
**Disclaimer: I refer to Black Friday shopping, but we did NOT get out early!

Just a few for now, but I'm going to start keeping a record on my desktop.

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